Dear God: Just Checking In

How does this go again?

Should I kneel?

Should I bless myself?

I used to as a kid.

I’ve been away a long time.

I wonder how that happened.

How long since my last confession?

Has it been that long?

1) “I am the Lord your God, you shall have no other gods before me”

Well, I think I’m ok with the First Commandment.

But if I could offer a suggestion?

Given the state of the world,

Could you make your intentions a little clearer?

2) “Do not make an image or any likeness of what is in the heavens above…”

I haven’t carved any statues lately, so Two looks good.

And bowing down is so un-Irish.

I’m with you in the vengeance area,

And I’ve compiled quite a collection of names myself.

3) “Do not swear falsely by the name of the LORD…”

Number Three I’m no good with,

I never have been,

And I know I never will be.

I’m hoping for a special dispensation on this one.

4) “Remember the Sabbath day and keep it holy”

Number Four looks ok.

Although you might bear in mind the times we live in.

My expenses are soaring and my checkbook’s a joke.

You may have gotten by on six days, but margins are smaller now.

5) “Honor your father and your mother…”

Number Five has gotten easier for me, only father left now.

Mom died of cancer this year.

She led a good life.

I guess you had your reasons, but you could have been easier on her.

6) “Do not murder”

Number Six is intact, no killing done here.

That’s not to say a good beating hasn’t crossed my mind.

Just look at some of the people that make the news.

Is that a sin?

7) “Do not commit adultery.”

Just me and the wife Lord,

So Seven’s just fine.

As long as she’ll have me,

It’s her for all time … Well, Larry David’s definition of all time.

8) “Do not steal.”

Number Eight is complicated.

How do you feel about white theft?

OK, I took a menu from the Trident hotel in Kinsale.

Forgive me?

9) “Do not bear false witness against your neighbor”

Number Nine is still intact.

My neighbors have nothing to fear from me.

It’s an isolated world these days Lord.

I don’t even know the names of their kids.

10) “Neither shall you desire your neighbor’s house, or anything that belongs to your neighbor.”

Number Ten can be hard at times.

I struggle like most people to make ends meet.

For a while I’d like not to.

And I’m OK with that.

© 2007, Tim (P) Prendeville

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