Posts Tagged ‘loneliness’

Every Now And Again

Every now and again
I look at you,
Captured there in a moment,
Smiling,
Mid sentence,
Mine,
The way I remember you.
And I think of those days
Those days
Those days when we were young,
Those days when all we needed,
And all we had,
Was each other and a dream

Every now and again
I think of late night talks,
And starry island nights
And promises made,
If not to you
At least to me,
And if not believed by you
At least by me,
Only to be dismissed in later days,
Alone,
And seen,
As you did back then,
As romantic notions
Dreamed of
In romantic places.

Every now and again
I look at you,
And wonder,
And pause,
And drift away,
And feel that old familiar feeling.
But all too soon it fades,
Surrendering to another pause,
One that reminds of today,
And yesterdays that are gone,
Put away like your photographs,
And memories
That can only be relived
Briefly.

© 2009, Tim (P) Prendeville

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Graveyards

No one runs in a graveyard.
No one shouts.
It is peaceful,
Calming,
Walking amongst those who came before.

Tip toe and listen to the silence,
Whisper the names of those you meet.
For most of those you chance upon,
You are their only visitor,
Save the daily procession of  new arrivals.

Who were all these people?
What lives did they live,
The same as I do now?
Did we share the same fears?
And joys?
And hopes?
And dreams?

Did they live lives fulfilled
Or take regret with them?
If given one more day to live,
What is it do you suppose they would do?
Where would they visit?
Who would they see?
What words of advice would they speak?
I can only imagine it would be magnificent,
Throwing off all the veils of a superficial life,
And living for one more day,
A lesson learned only in death.

© 2009, Tim (P) Prendeville

Trapped (song lyrics version)

Where are you now,
In these every days?
Are you still you and living
As I used to know?

Give me back those days,
My today’s I will trade,
For they just pass and fill my moments,
Alone.

Outside eyes are peering
Seeing only prim rose shadows.
I am hiding from the world
A life unseen,
Oh I am hiding
A life unseen.

I am growing old,
Life is too,
And I am weary for a past
That’s lost along with you..

Release me to that past
Where I belong with you
My one and only one
I let slip away.

Outside eyes are peering
Seeing only prim rose shadows.
I am hiding from the world
A life unseen,
Oh I am hiding
A life unseen.

© 2008, Tim (P) Prendeville

Without Wings (alternate)

Had I listened more in youth
I would have more answers than questions
But I didn’t
So I don’t
I flittered my days away
In the guiltless abandonment of the moment
I don’t know why
But I did

I would like to think it not my fault
My life resigned to role of minion
Too little discipline
Too much time
Too little foresight
In my prime

Whatever the reason
Life has moved on
And I punch a clock
And I serve my time
And I grind an anvil
And I wait in line

I have a regiment of should haves
And could haves
And would haves
But they have grown old
And tired,
And so have I

© 2008, Tim (P) Prendeville

Phonecalls from the past

When I was a child

Life was good,

And lived in moments

Unpondered.

But that was then.

In my days of now,

Too many times,

Life comes calling,

Uninvited.

This is how I live.

Was life so good

In those good old days

Of which I speak

So often?

Or was it just just the innocence of youth?

The emotions of confliction,

All too familiar

In my everyday life,

Haunt me,

And hide me from the world.

Where is my world,

The one I dreamed of

Before life took hold,

And trapped me

In a present,

Fixed in the past?

© 2008, Tim (P) Prendeville

Firsts and Lasts

I remember our first day together

It is as clear to me now as our last.

You were smiling

Lost in a moment

And I, lost in my youth

Intruded.

 

I remember two people on a silly road

Far from home

And the ties that bind

Free from prying eyes

Values and morals

Letting things be.

 

I remember the thrill of youth

The carefree thoughts of those early days

In a time where age allowed adventure

And the world held no fear.

It was in those days that we began our journey

Together.

 

I remember the things we shared

Those things we found along the way.

Trinkets and gems of time

Precious only to the few

That through the years

Became our own.

 

I remember good times spent

It is those I take with me;

My todays bring their own pain.

Leave the past as it is

It has led to roads otherwise unknown

It has brought me here.

 

I remember our last day together

Going through the motions

Of watching a life disappear.

And saying goodbye

And knowing it was final

And feeling lost.

 

© 2008, Tim (P) Prendeville

Tim Prendeville

The Apple Trees

When I was born my parents planted a tree
It came to be known as my tree.
They planted five in all
And each was named.
They have grown much since then
And as if to mimic life,
Some are big
Some are small
Some reach high
Some not so tall
But the roots in each are strong.
In summer they all bear fruit
And limbs grow heavy.
But branches long since merged
Have made them strong
Intertwined like vines on a wall.
In years past the fruit was always used
But these days it often spoils
Resigned to blanket a garden no longer played in.
The sights and sounds of autumn are familiar.
Birds busying themselves with plans for winter
Hopping from tree to tree comparing notes
All the while whistling a tune.
A final clearing of the garden
One more cut and raking of the lawn
Each tree a trimming of its branches
Seasonal changes bring seasonal chores.
Winter paints its own picture
The lonely months.
The trees are without life
There is no fruit
There are few birds to speak of
They are alone with themselves
With visitors very few
Save the crows that never leave.
Spring again the garden feels renewed
The trees begin to bloom with life returned
Shaking off Jack Frost and winter slumber
They stretch.
Another year has passed
The trees have grown
But I remember them when they were small.
Sometimes … I wish they still were.
© 2007, Tim (P) Prendeville